When I started writing the “Things I want my kids to know” series of posts, I immediately thought about all the things that my kids would like me to know in return. Being a parent yourself, I am sure that you, just like me, have many things you would like to tell your parents.
Many times, I think of posting on this blog as writing my will to my kids. When my kids get a chance to read a post, I feel proud and know that when I am long gone, they will be able to come here and read all the things their mother ever wanted for them or from them.
When I think of what I want for and from my kids, it makes me wonder of all the things they want for and from me. I guess if my kids had a kids’ blog, they would call it “Things I want my parents to know” and in it, they would write all the things they need to feel safe, loved and happy. They would probably have posts similar to the ones below:
- My dear parents, please love me with all your heart! Kids never waste that love, because they are born not knowing how to love themselves. Love me and this will teach me to love myself.
- My dear parents, please give me your attention! There is no such thing as spoiled kids. Attention is what makes your kids connect with you. If you pay attention to me, I will learn to connect.
- My dear parents, please be consistent! Kids need rules and boundaries to understand the world they live in. Even when they are not happy when you are firm, they learn to appreciate the certainty this brings to their life and learn to trust you. Teach me consistency, so I can feel safe.
- My dear parents, please give me your understanding! I do not know all the things, I cannot always explain myself as I would like and I make mistakes. Teach me how to learn from my mistakes, because this is my way to personal growth.
- My dear parents, please be honest! Kids, however young and inexperienced, can recognize the truth and will cherish it forever. Teach me honesty to build up my values and wisdom.
- My dear parents, please inspire me! Encourage me to find love and friendship, to excel, to be happy and curious, to be honest and grateful. Because kids look up to their parents as idols. You are my idol. Use it to inspire me to be the best that I can be.
- My dear parents, please accept me! Whether or not I am good at sport or getting A’s in all my subjects, whether or not I fulfill your dreams of playing a musical instrument, love me as I am. Kids need to find their own path in life. They are not supposed to live their parents’ dreams. Accept me and this will allow me to find my way better and faster.
- My dear parents, please help me! When I fall, help me get up, just like you did when I was a toddler. Kids appreciate any help, even if they do not say “Thank you”. Help me so I can learn in time to help myself.
- My dear parents, please parent me with passion! When I look at you, I can tell if parenting me is making you happy and proud or you think it is too much for you. Kids need to know they are a source of pride. Parent me with passion so that my biggest desire will be to be a parent just like you!
- My dear parents, please forgive me! For all the sleepless nights, for all the worries, for all the nagging and tantrums, for all the confusion and anger. If kids could, they would do it differently. Forgive me and this will free me from guilt and give me permission to be myself.
- My dear parents, please stay together! Kids, no matter how smart and strong, no matter how old, will never lose hope of bringing their parents back together. Be together so I will learn respect.
- My dear parents, please be healthy! I need you now and always will. Kids need their parents even when they become parents themselves. Keep yourself healthy so you and I can enjoy my glory days together.
Of course, when I write to my kids, I put photos of kids, but when they write to me, they will put photos of parents.
Tell me what you think your kids would like to write to you.
Happy parenting,
Ronit